


Come back for me

by mythicalpatterns



Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: Angst, Fluff and Angst, How Do I Tag, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Pining, Polyamory Negotiations
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-17
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-08-31 11:11:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8576155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythicalpatterns/pseuds/mythicalpatterns
Summary: It had been 523 days since the last time. He tried to ignore the fact that he knew that and what that might say about him, that his mind secretly counted every day and every minute.
He couldn’t explain it. How the brotherly hand on the shoulder suddenly turned into something else. What exactly made the difference he did not know. But he felt it. Undoubtedly and without mercy.





	1. Don't ruin it

**Author's Note:**

> So i binge-read all this amazing fanfiction and get all inspired and shit and form the most amazing stories in my mind and then it all somehow falls apart on the way out cause you know, typing is HARD and forming beautiful poetry out of scenes in my head is even worse and somehow doesn't translate very well.
> 
> ANYWAY, I'm not a native-speaker so please excuse any weird grammar or spelling and feel free to point anything out if it doesn't make any sense at all (I stayed up way to late to write this).
> 
> I want to write more of this but I have a tendency to not finish things. There's still hope though. Comments and kudos are higlhy appreciated (srsly, it makes me cry with joy. Almost.) 
> 
> Oh yeah, I had the Habits of my heart EP by James Young on repeat while writing this and may or may not have stolen some lyrics from it, shhh.

It had been 523 days since the last time. He tried to ignore the fact that he knew that and what that might say about him, that his mind secretly counted every day and every minute. It began as usual. So small at first, barely noticeable. A lingering look, a simple touch that was so much more than that. He couldn’t explain it. How the brotherly hand on the shoulder suddenly turned into something else. What exactly made the difference he did not know. But he felt it. Undoubtedly and without mercy. 

He tried to ignore it at first. Act normal, trying to seem oblivious for the familiar signs. He knew that it was hopeless but he also knew what it was going do to him if he gave in. There would be satisfaction, heaven, bliss even but coming down from that high? He didn’t want to think about that. 

It wasn’t that Link used him. It was mutual usage then. But it was always on his terms. Between the times whenever Rhett came to close Link would shy away, tell him off (on camera usually with a grimace). Even on times where they were meant to be close, like posing for a photo or doing a skit or heck even filming GMM and it wouldn't have been anything weird about linger in an intimate pose - he would shrug him of, turn away or coldly remove fingers Rhett almost desperately dug into him. 

But when Link did it. Like the times he patted his shoulders, looked at him with a crooked smile or gripped after his wrist. There was fierceness in it, a need so greedy that Rhett almost couldn’t keep his usual calm. He was afraid of those touches and glances at the same time as he lived for them. Sometimes he tried to avoid it, played the same game as Link but he could never hide the thirst in his eyes and sometimes he had to hide something else entirely. And in the end he could not say no, could not deny this man. Cause he didn’t want to, or at least not truly. Though he knew all too well how hard it was going be. Afterwards. When Link turned away again. When the touches, the words and the smiles became that of a friend and a brother again. No longing in the azure blue eyes, the intensity buried behind warm affection. Lovingly but not enough. Not enough for what he just awoke in Rhett. It always took him at least half a year to get back to normal. That he could feel fully relaxed in Links company again, sleep dreamless nights and think only about his wife when he kissed her. 

And it had gotten worse. Last time made him tumble down in a dark room full of the images of his best friend that he desperately tried to forget. He spent so many sleepless nights in burning sheets, so many days with lightning behind his eyes. Pictures blazing through his mind. 

 _The soft curve of the lips. His hands in the silky darkness that was Links hair. The slender body beneath his own,_ _w_ _iry_ _hands slowly making their way down, down_ _, down._ _Shivering traces of sweat._ _Soft moans against his skin._  

Working was torture then, when Links touches was back to normal, his voice calm and casual and not the low sensual whispers that haunted Rhett's dreams. He managed to get through it. Pushed everything back, locked it in deep within some corner of his mind. Jessie had been so mad at Link that time he remembered with a smile. In the midst of all this he was a lucky man, making his living of things he loved with his best friend, two amazing kids and a wife that supported him beyond reason. 

He had told her before they got married. About the so called 'incident'. He'd said as it was. That there was a time he and Link had tried to figure it out. What they were, what exactly they were _meant_ to be. They hadn't found an answer but they had realized one thing: they couldn’t bare the thought of not being with each other. And so they'd decided to stay friends, stay brothers in heart and soul and nothing more.  

Thinking about it now Rhett wondered if it was because they were afraid. He didn’t know but he didn’t think so. Yeah, they grew up in a very conservative environment and it would have been scary, if not terrifying to go through that kind of journey. And there _had_ been that initial thought of _this is_ _wrong_ but it had subsided quickly, at least for him. He didn't give the nature of it much thought, never thought it was that big of a deal. He couldn’t put a label on it. He had never felt anything toward any other man. And Link. There wasn’t just the attraction and it wasn’t at all the same he felt towards his wife or towards any other woman before her. In their usual life when they were best friends they were still so much more than that. It did not fit the categories of friend, brother or even lover. 

And today, living in California and all, surrounded by openminded people living different lives, he could not care less about wether all these mixed up feelings meant he was gay or bi or Linksexual. He knew Link saw it a bit differently, the anxious nature he was. Links world consisted of boxes, neatly packed, nothing interfering with the other. If something from one box ended up in another he had to clean it up, had to put it back even though it happened over and over again. Another person might be starting to think about relabeling some of them or simply just let some things be spread around without having to shove them back were they supposedly belong. But that wasn’t Link.   

When Rhett told Jessie about it she asked him if he thought that it would ever happen again and he found himself not knowing what to answer despite the decision he and Link had taken. For some strange reason that he couldn't comprehend she kissed his cheek and said that she understood and that whatever happened she would want to know about it. He loved her so much then and there that he suddenly fell certain he never would have to tell her something like that. 

He was wrong. 

Somewhere along the way with the kids, the move to California, the growing of the Mythical Entertainment and the countless (not really, they _did_  count them) episodes of GMM, somewhere in between all that it awoke again. It had always been there, never forgotten but tamed and still under their skin and within their minds. It started to stir, Rhett suddenly feeling tingly waiting for Link to pick him up in the morning, Link leaning in closer whenever they talked and an overall restlessness in them both. Like something was coming for them and they were supposed to run but they couldn't figure out why. And so one rainy evening outside the office both hurried towards the car when Rhett suddenly felt Links hand on his arm, stopping him midstep. 

 “What, man?” he turned around and found himself faced with an almost ghost- white Link, mouth slightly agape like he just realized something. Water dripped down his chin, the rain straightened out his wings (which he still had at the time). His grip around Rhett’s arm tightened. Under heavy lids, piercing blue eyed him with intensity that almost felt physical. 

“Uhm, Link ... hey, buddy, it’s pouring can we …” Rhett started, confused and with a growing cramping feeling in his stomach. There was a sudden _thump_ of his heart, like it wanted to draw his attention to something. His gaze fluttered from Links eyes down his body and how the fabric of his button up shirt had started to cling to the lithe body. Then Link took the last step that separated them, almost crashed into Rhetts chest and there was wet cold lips upon his, erasing every other thought in his mind. 

 

***  

 

This time it began with a smile. That halfsmile of Links always made Rhett feel warm and at ease. It was not an unusual one for Link, this lopsided grin but now there was also the taunting gaze from eyes slightly squinted. The blue glimmered with mischief when his eyes lingered just a little too long. It did not fail. Rhett immediately felt a rush, a tingle that started in his stomach racing its way up through his chest. He swallowed, crossed his arms and turned to the camera again, continuing to talk about whatever that episode was about.   

They were silent on the way home, Rhett's eyes fixated on the road but he could feel the glances Link threw his way. By a red light his right hand left the wheel for a second, as if to change gear but instead he placed it on Rhett's restless leg. A bit too high up to just be a casual touch and before he let go there was a light squeeze. Rhett continued to stare out the window, struggling to keep his breath steady. There was a low sigh from Link and a minute later he slapped his hands against the wheel, seemingly frustrated. 

“Dang it”, he murmured. 

Rhett couldn’t resist glancing at him in the corner of his eye. There was a frown on his forehead and he was nibbling on his lower lip. His hands tightly gripped the wheel, knuckles white. Rhett quickly returned his gaze upon the road, licking his lips. 

He was out of the car before Link had brought it to a full stop, mumbled a “goodbye” over his shoulder and hurried towards the door. It wasn’t until the sound of the engine faded away that he felt the tension in his shoulders. Like he’d been holding his breath. 

He told Jessie about it when she met him in the hallway, wondering about his day. He always did. She frowned, stroke his cheek worried. 

“Are you okay?” she asked softly. 

He shrugged. 

“I don’t know … I don’t want it to get like last time", he brought his hand up to rub his eyes. "Gosh I don’t know how too …” 

“Schh, baby”, she reeled him into a hug, kissed him lovingly on the bearded jaw. “Maybe you should talk to him?” 

He leaned his head on her hair, closed his eyes and drew in her familiar, calming scent. 

“Yeah … maybe.” 

  

The truth was that they had talked about it. A couple of times even. Last time had been those 523 days ago. They'd ended up on Links sofa (his wife and kids away for the night). Rhett's long arm around the smaller man who rested his head on his shoulder. It rarely happened like that, that they stayed together afterwards. Usually Link went up and put his clothes on in minutes but this time he stayed, breathing heavily against Rhett's neck. His fingertips softly tracing mythical patterns along his upper arm. Links silky skin, a little damp from sweat against his own naked body made his heart beat so hard that he almost thought it would break through his chest.  

At first Rhett couldn’t force himself to speak, he wanted this moment to last and never end, did not want to ruin it. At the same time he was terrified that any second Link would push himself of him, turn his back and leave the room and it would be over without him ever getting to say what he needed to. He sighed, ran his finger through his hair. Link tilted his head, looking up at him with a question in his heavenly blue eyes. Rhett felt something tightening in his chest. Those eyes. Without the glasses, with the hair in a mess around the slender face everything about this man was so… soft, vulnerable. Delicate. Rhett drew him closer, leaned down and placed a featherlike kiss on Links slightly parted lips.   

“You can’t keep doing this” He whispered, shaking his head in disbelief.  

“What d’you mean?” Link reached up to caress his cheek but Rhett turned away. 

“You know” He swallowed nervously, looking for the right words. “Come back for me.” 

To his surprise there was a low chuckle from Link. He took a steady grip around his jaw and turned his head back, forced Rhett to look at him again. 

“I’ll always come back for you, brotha', you know I will” he said with a mischievous grin, his sharp corner teeth showing making him look like a playful cat. Oh gosh those blending white teeth behind the pink softness of the lips. It was enough to make the heat rise from deep within Rhett again. 

It took all of his inner strength but he pushed the smaller man of himself, sat up and leaned his head in his hands. 

“How does this work for you?” He heard his frustration ring in his words, almost like anger. “How can you just let this happen and then be like … like its nothing, like it never happened.” 

Left in the corner of the sofa was a confused and almost hurt looking Link. He fiddled with his fingers, intertwining his hands, looking down. A glimmer in his eyes. 

“I thought… I thought this was what we both wanted.” He half whispered, biting his lip. The broad shoulders fell. 

Rhett looked at him, resisting the urge to reach out and comfort him. He looked so miserable, so in need of protection. But he wasn’t. Rhett was the one in need, the one with a heart so easily breaking in Links hands. 

“I’m not like you” he said. “I can’t turn it on and off.” 

Link drew his legs up, leaned his head against his knees and closed his eyes. 

“I don’t”, he said so low that Rhett almost couldn’t hear. Link lifted his head again, looked right at him. “I never turn it off, Rhett, it’s always there.” He let go of his knees and slid closer, hesitantly reaching out to caress his arm and Rhett let him. 

“But I can’t let it out, you know that.” Link shook his head.  “I’m afraid I’ll take it too far. I’m afraid I’ll ruin it.” 

Rhett followed the movement of Links Adams apple when he talked, almost hypnotized. He sighed and let the silence spread for a moment. 

“And this won’t?” He finally said with a slight quiver in his voice. 

They looked at each other. Heavenly blue against the vague greybluegreenish that was Rhetts eyes. Link looked down. 

“I dunno.”He scooted closer, hid his face against Rhett's upper arm, nuzzled into his skin. There was a muffled sob and then he looked up again “I don’t wanna hurt you Rhett.” 

His voice almost broke and there were tears in his eyes and everything about him seemed so innocent and there was no way Rhett could be mad or whatever he was. He laid his arms around his lover. His lips against the soft raven hair, the scent so familiar and yet so exhilarating. There was another sob from Link and Rhett hushed. 

“I know, baby” he said calmly. ”I know.” 

And that was how far they ever had come on the topic.


	2. A heartbeat away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crystal blue because the lightning was just right and the shirt he wore brought the color out even more. Big wiry hands just a millimeter away, close enough to accidentally brush against yet so heartbreakingly far away. The unmistakable profile, sharp jawline, slim nose and the dark waterfall of hair swept back in a pompadour. Always in the corner of his sight. A heartbeat away. So close and yet not nearly close enough.

The next day Link seemed normal when he came to pick Rhett up but he knew it was just a matter of time. Rhett couldn't really let himself go during the recording, being very distant and slightly irritated towards Link and the crew. Link started acting overly silly, trying to lure Rhett into laughing, which he did because he could never resist that stupid grin and awkward antics. It made him both more irritated and confused. Wanting to let go and just relish in their easy banter, enjoying the moment but at the same time afraid to do so. When they went on lunchbreak, Stevie laid a hand on his arm, asking if he was okay.

“Uh, sure I’m just …” He threw a glance at the counter where Link just laughed at something Alex said. Throwing his head back a little, the Adams apple moving with the sound. Rhett returned his gaze to Stevie who raised her brow. “… a bit off today. It’ll probably be better when I've got something to eat.”

She shrugged in a silent “if you say so” and squeezed his arm a little before she let go.

“Just tell me if you need anything.”

Rhett pulled himself together and the rest of the day went by smoothly.

 

***

 

Being Friday and all everyone went home early. Rhett lingered in the office while Link was out fixing something in the studio. He was relieved about that and at the same time kind of dreading the drive home. He was glad there was a weekend ahead. He really needed a break and just … not think about all this.

_Crystal blue because the lightning was just right and the shirt he wore brought the color out even more. Big wiry hands just a millimeter away, close enough to accidentally brush against yet so heartbreakingly far away. The unmistakable profile, sharp jawline, slim nose and the dark waterfall of hair swept back in a pompadour. Always in the corner of his sight. A heartbeat away. So close and yet not nearly close enough._

Rhett shook his head, tried to draw himself out of it. He glanced at the clock, it’d just passed four. They were planning on leaving half past. It seemed like an eternity. He went to the bathroom. Splashing his face with water, he rolled his eyes at the cliché nature of that, trying to gather his thoughts. In the hallway on the way back he met Link.

“Hey man, what’s …” Rhett started but suddenly he was against the wall, Link’s hands on his hips, placing hungry kisses on the base of his neck working his way up. Rhett went limp, surrendered to the burning sensation of Link’s lips. Did not protest but did not really participate either. It was like he shut off. He let the shorter man struggle to reach up by himself, not helping by leaning forward but even so, soon enough Link’s mouth was on his. Silky softness and the cold taste of mint. He had probably brushed his teeth before, being Link and all. Rhett registered that his lips were moving, kissing Link back as by their own will. He could feel his best friends body against his, lean and muscular, pressing him up against the background. He felt lightheaded.

"Link … please" Rhett whispered between kisses, his words not more than a breath against Link’s lips. The smaller man answered with a light moan, trailing his hands up and down his body with fueled intensity. His right hand stretched down to Rhett’s thigh and, on the way up, graced over his groin. Rhett gasped starting to have a very hard time forming thoughts.

And then; a sudden blaze of, if not anger, then something similar, broke through his passiveness. It merged with the burning from Links caresses and so Rhett broke free from the hungry kiss, gripped his wrists and in one turning motion he slammed the startled man against the wall. Heavy breathing and a low growl escaped Rhett's mouth when he pressed Link’s arms up over his head, put his right leg between his best friends, pushing him further back and pinning him to the wall. Their eyes met, locked, and there was surprise in the deep set blue. Rhett snarled and leaned over, pressing his mouth onto Link’s, bending the lips apart with his tongue. He sucked the bottom one into his mouth, biting into it not caring if it hurt, he just wanted to taste – to feel. And he felt. He felt Link flinch, trying to back away and there was a strained sound of pain from him. Rhett kept his grip, the weight of his body impossible for Link to fight against. There was a faint taste of metal. Link struggled to keep up with his pace, his tongue digging deep.

Rhett crossed Link’s wrists and held them in place with his left hand while he laid the right upon the base of his neck instead. Pretty loose at first but then he tightened his grip, let his thumbnail trace around the goozle before sliding the hand up, putting some pressure on it. There was a muffled moan from Link. Rhett felt as if there was built up rage mixed with the exhilarating feeling of having Link’s lean body beneath him. He was in total control and he gave no mercy.

He tightened his grip around Links neck for half a second then slid it down beginning to unbutton his shirt. He struggled with the small buttons under his big hands, gave up after three, and yanked down causing buttons to fly all over the place. There was a protesting yelp from Link but Rhett ignored it and slid his hand underneath the fabric wanting to feel everywhere at once. Soft black hair under his hands, hardened small nubs so sensitive to his touch, small whimpers from the raven-haired man that Rhett tasted and swallowed. Link wriggled under his touch. Rhett felt the brunettes growing hardness against his thigh and he brought his hand down to palm Link through his jeans. He groaned.

And then he let go. Stepped away, turned back and left the hallway, leaving a heavy breathing Link behind.

 

***

 

It wasn’t until he was already out on the parking lot he remembered that they were supposed to drive home together. He stopped, ran his hands over his beard trying to calm himself down. His jeans felt tight. His blood ran like alcohol in his veins, made him feel a bit faint. He didn’t know why he left and he didn’t know what to do now. 

Fifteen minutes later a still very messy looking Link sat down in the passenger seat of the car. He had buttoned his shirt the wrong way (to be fair, he’d done a good job considering the missing buttons) and his hair was kind of all of over the place. His bottom lip was red and swollen where Rhett had sunk his teeth in. Rhett couldn’t help but chuckle despite the situation and at Links offended grimace the chuckle grew into a booming laughter that eventually made his stomach hurt. Leaning against the wheel he continued laughing, a mixture of feelings rushing through him.

“What the heck Rhett?!” Link exclaimed. “How… what?”

He looked at Rhett with a wild gaze that made Rhett laugh even more and Link saw a glance of himself in the rear mirror and started to giggle, realizing the ridiculousness in the situation. They laughed, the sounds mingled together as so many times before and when it started to subside their eyes met and they burst out again.

Finally Rhett leaned back with a deep sigh, rubbing his eyes with his hands. They were quite for a while, only low chuckles now and then. Eventually Link pushed his glasses up and cleared his throat.

“So are we going back in or what?” He looked at Rhett, still smiling but once again with that hint of _something_ in his eyes. He was up to no good. Rhett felt his worries gather but then Link laid his hand over his and there was no way he could say no.

 

Rhett closed the studio-door behind them. He didn’t know why Link wanted them to go here, there was a perfectly functional sofa in the office but he knew better than to reason with the stubborn man right now. Link turned the lights on, not all of them ‘cause oh that would been a perfect way to kill the mood, but the softer lights above the mythical desk and the set.

Rhett stood by the desk, stroking the surface almost fondly, looking at the marks in the tree and trying to remember which episode a certain scratch came from. When Link came up to him and laid his hand over Rhett’s he didn’t look up at first. He felt the warmth radiating from Link’s body, heard his shallow breaths close to his ear and the faint smell of all those things that were Link enfolded him. Fruitiness and musk mingled together. Mint, peppermint to be exact and a soft whiff of peanut butter. But that wasn’t all.

_The first day of spring after a long winter, the air full of hope and promises of sunny days stretching out on the banks of Cape Fear. Exploring woods and getting lost in time. Dust and oil and heat bumping in the seats of the omega, carefree and excited for every small little thing life brought their way. Two bloody palms against each other, a promise cut deep not only in skin but in heart and soul. Mountains and woods and rivers and pizza every birthday. Home._

They stood like that for a little while. Then Rhett turned his head and looked at Link. He reached out and took off his glasses, folded them gently and put them down on the desk below them. Link brought his hands to Rhett’s hips and drew him closer. Rhett laid his hands in the dip of Links narrow waist, once again marveled at how good they fit there, like his hand were meant to hold this man. He felt his fingertips tingle, a spreading warmth in his chest and a sudden weakness in his knees.

Rhett leaned in and their lips met in a soft kiss, not like the desperate kisses in the hallway, but a slow tender kiss full of longing. Link circled his fingers around the nape of Rhett’s neck, running his fingers through the short hair. Rhett shuddered.

Somehow, Rhett didn’t really know how since time and space just kind of melted away around him, they ended up on the sofa in the corner. It was way too small for the purpose but neither man really cared. Rhett sat down; Link straddled his lap and started working on unbuttoning Rhett’s shirt with a little more care than the blonde had with his. Rhett ran his hands up and down Links back, settling them once again on his waist. He looked up, took in the features of the beautiful face now fixed in concentration. Link tugged at his bottom lip and when he finally could discard Rhett’s shirt from his chest a smile pulled at his mouth. Underneath thick lashes his eyes glimmered dark with what Rhett only could read as desire. Soon enough both their shirts were tossed aside and Rhett could let his hands roam free over Link’s broad chest and shoulders, dipping into the pronounced dimples over his collarbones, teasing the small nubs that drew high-pitched whimpers from Link’s mouth and made him grind hard against Rhett’s crotch. 

“You’re so hawt.” Rhett drawled earning a giggle from Link who leaned forward.

“And you’re such a dork”, he chuckled, mouth against Rhett’s neck. He alternated between kisses and licks and then there was a sharp pain shooting through Rhett, acute canines breaking his skin. He let out a sound somewhere between a yelp and a moan. He brought a hand up, entangling it in Link’s hair.

“So we’re biting now, huh?” he rumbled, tugging a little at the strands. He felt Link’s smile against his skin where he now kissed and nibbled.

“You started it.”

Rhett snorted.

“Well you had it coming for ya’, _Neal._ ”

With that Rhett took a firm grip around Links hips and lifted him up at the same time as turning them both around so that Link laid flat underneath him on the limited surface, his knees bent and one foot on the floor. The sudden and rough motion cause Link’s head to bump into the couch hard armrest with a low _thump_.

"Ouch, _hey!”_ He grumbled bringing a hand up to rub the back of his head.

"Sorry, you okay?" Rhett worryingly caressed his shoulder.

There was no answer but a raised eyebrow and a smirk and then Link reached up, grabbed the back of Rhett’s neck and brought him down to a kiss that sent shivers down the tall man’s spine. Link’s mouth devoured him and he lost himself in the sensation of their naked chests against each other, the taste of Link on his tongue and the throbbing in his pants.

There was a pause. Trembling hands unbuttoning jeans. The air filled with their heavy breaths interrupted now and then with a kiss wherever they came to. Rhett had to stand up to step out of his pants and when he’d pushed them aside he helped Link getting both his jeans and boxers off before returning to his place huddled between Link’s legs. They crashed into each other again, this time with growing impatience. Rhett moaned when his hardened sex slid up against Links, all slick with sweat and pre- come.

“Gosh, Rhett …” Link mumbled while peppering Rhett’s bearded jaw with kisses. He gasped when the bigger man thrusted, created as much friction as possible between them. “ … I need, you need to …”

Rhett hoisted himself up looking down at Link with an arched eyebrow.

“I need to what?” he teased, slowly running his fingers down Links chest, ending up teasingly trail across the hipbone. The younger man’s face was a lovely shade of flushed pink and the color on his cheeks darkened when he raised his eyes, looking all shy and innocent. Rhett knew better and when he looked into the usually bright blue eyes, pupils now so dilated that they almost seemed black, he was rewarded with a devious smile. Link brought his hand up, curled his fingers around Rhett’s strong jaw and slowly brought him down to level his head with his own. He laid his lips against his ear.

“Rhett”, he said, his voice low and raspy so far from the lighthearted silliness he usually portrayed. “You need to fuck me.” The words and the vibrations of them against Rhett’s skin caused the hairs on his arms to stand up, sending shivers down his body. “ _Now.”_ The last word sounding like something between a plea and a command.

Rhett was not going to protest. They didn’t really have a way that they usually did this and both of them had bottomed before when it’d come to that but for Link to give that kind of control over to Rhett was always exhilarating.

Link leant over, reaching for something on the floor. He got hold of his jeans and took out a small bottle from one of the pockets. He handed it to Rhett who didn’t hesitate with opening it and squeezing out some of the content.

Rhett did remember the last time he did this, (years ago in a fancy and a lot more spacey hotel bed that time) but he once again marveled at how tight it was just to get the tip of one of his fingers in. He wriggled and twisted at the same time as he caressed Links stomach to get him to relax. He listened to the strained breaths knowing that when they got a bit deeper it was safe to proceed.

Slowly but surely he could add another finger and ultimately a third. It could have been tedious work if it wasn’t for how beautifully Link fell to pieces by his treatment. His jaw slack, eyes fluttering and incoherent words and moans dancing over his lips. When Rhett started to scissor his fingers, opening him up even more Link bucked his hips, dug his fingernails into his own chest. Rhett felt hypnotized by his movements and the sight of his best friend’s dick glistening of pre- come, twitching against his stomach.

He brought his fingers out, leaving Link to mewl at the loss of them. Once again Rhett squeezed a fair amount of lube out of the bottle, slickening up his own length. He sighed by the touch and drew a few strokes before lining himself up. The sofa was not optimal for this, he struggled to find a position that wouldn’t cause them both to fall off, one foot on the floor and the other leg awkwardly bent. Link hooked his legs around Rhett’s waist, drawing him closer. His breaths were deep and heavy, sending shudders through Rhett’s body.

He slid the tip against Link’s cleft, teasing a little but unable to do so for long already feeling close by the sight before him. So he started to press the tip in, slowly, grabbing Links waist to hold him in place. He could almost hear his own heart beat in the air, pulse racing.

“You okay?” He asked Link who’d closed his eyes and was biting his lip, a slight frown on his forehead. He nodded though and Rhett pressed on, holding back the urge to slam in hard, burying himself in the tight wetness, the feeling of Link’s inside around him almost overwhelming.

After what seemed to be an eternity he bottomed out. He leaned forward, placing a kiss on Link’s lips and then looked down at him, his eyes were still closed, lips slightly parted.

“Hey”, Rhett whispered, softly brushing a few strands of hair out of Link’s face. “You still with me buddy?”

Link opened his eyes, and it was like a lightning bolt through Rhett’s body. He felt like falling into those eyes, leaving everything behind and just drown in the gaze Link gave him.

“Rhett.” His voice deep. “Please fuck me now.”

Rhett obliged. He raised himself up, took a firm grip around Links thighs and drew himself out to the tip just to slam back in earning an extracted moan from Link. The smaller man met his every thrust with an eagerness that took the breath out of Rhett and he started to loose himself in it. The room faded away around them, the air filled with panting, moaning and the sound of flesh pounding against flesh. Link mumbled profanities that Rhett never heard him say, adding to the fire that burned inside him, his hold on his body almost certain to cause bruising.  

 

It was rough and filthy until it weren’t. Rhett looked at the man writhing beneath him, truly looked at him and while he was thrusting into him with all the pleasurable sensations it brought he felt his heart swell.

Link’s back was arched just a little, head fallen back and eyes fluttered shut. His body was a beautiful curve, all the way from the narrow hips to the broad shoulders. His delicately shaped lips parted, glistening in the dim light, the most wonderful moans and whimpers falling from them. And then Link opened his eyes and Rhett saw so much more.

_Link looking up over his laptop, smiling at him. Link fiddling with his hands while talking, thinking, whatever he did really. Link in the backyard playing with his kids, all giggles and loving embraces. Link rolling his eyes at something he said. Link’s face filled with determination whenever he worked at something. Link saying things without thinking and then realizing and trying to cover it up only to tangle himself up in his words even more. Link laughing beside him, head thrown back, hands at his chest._

Rhett felt a desperation grow in his body, a need he didn’t know how to please but he tried by driving himself deeper into Link, leaning over and taking his head in his hands, grasping at the dark strands of hair. Temple against temple he picked up the pace, chasing the release, hoping it would drive the sudden anxiety away, hoping it would satisfy whatever this was, hoping to god _something_ could ease this …

He brought his lips down to Links in a messy kiss, sweat running down his brow. In this he changed his angle a little brushing up against Links bundle of nerves making the man gasp and clutch at Rhett’s back with a frenzy.

“Rh … Rhett” He breathed. “Baby, I’m gonna … Oh gosh, I can’t … please”

Rhett relished in the sound of his raspy pleads against his ear and thrusted into the spot again and again and again, feeling Links body tense underneath him, preparing for the release.

When he came he clawed at Rhett’s shoulders, bit into his neck and screamed his name. His whole body shuddered and twisted underneath Rhett who felt the sticky warmth against his stomach. Feeling the clenching tightness around his length he started to thrust erratically, a familiar retraction in his groin.

“C’mon baby” Link whispered against his mouth. “Come for me.”

In one hard thrust Rhett buried himself in his best friend. Link’s name ripped from deep within, falling over his lips in a cry and it felt so good and it hurt and suddenly his sight was blurred and his throat tight and something was ringing in his ears and his chest ached and he could not, he could not move or think or ...

He fell over, crashed into Links body, sobbing into the crook of his neck. His hart as messy as their bodies. For a fragment of a second the feeling of his own heavy limbs draped over the smaller man’s frame brought him back to their dorm room wrestling matches which only made him cry more.

"I'm dead", he wanted to mumble to lighten the mood, draw the attention away from the fact that he was crying harder than he'd done in years, if ever. But what fell from his lips instead was an:

"I love you", broken in half, every syllable also a tear staining Links skin. Rhett drew a wheezy breath. "Oh god I love you so much", he cried into Links shoulder.

Link wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight, squeezing as if it was possibly for them to get closer. He ran his fingers through Rhett’s hair, placed his mouth on his temple.

"Rhett", he whispered and pressed his lips hard against the blonde man’s forehead. He held him while his body shook, the sobs muffled and strained. "Rhett, Rhett, Rhett", Link mumbled into his hair, cradling the bigger man that hid his face against his neck. As he held his weeping best friend, the giant man’s naked body against his, still _within_ him, he felt like the ground beneath him was shifting.

"Shhh, baby … s'okay” he reassured, tightening his embrace even more, tried to hold them both together as he felt himself falling apart. Rhett was his tree, tall and strong and with roots deep in the earth grounding them both. This was new, this was uncharted and _terrifying_ cause he thought he knew all the sides of Rhett, every angle and every reflection, and yet here they were: Rhett a shivering mess in his arms and Link not knowing what to do, not know how to fix this. He pressed kisses into the dirty blonde hair, tried to calm himself with the familiar scent of it.

“It’s okay”, he whispered. “It'll be okay."

But he didn’t know if it would be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhm yeah so that happened. Never written smut before, hope it was okay. Not that fond of some bits of this but amazed that I completed another chapter so apparaently miracles can happen! Dying for kudos and comments, or you know, at least in a figuratively sense. Thank you for reading!


	3. Not enough

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lingering touches. Stolen kisses in the hallways. Nights with skin against skin, hot breaths and quieted moans. A constant weakness in his knees. Warmth coiling in his stomach, bubbling up in laughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of talking in this chapter and also a lot of Christy, I don't really know how that happened. Also I think I love Stevie a little to much.

The ride home was unbearably quiet. Rhett - his tears finally stopped running - stared out the window. He hadn’t talked since they let go of each other, getting dressed in a silence filled with words not said. Link glanced over at the man he’d known almost all of his life and didn’t recognize him. He looked like a shell, like everything had gone out of him and he’d been dried out. Link felt numb and he grew angry at himself for it. He always had all sorts of feelings within reach. Where were they now? When his best friend clearly needed him, needed _something_ from him. Link wasn’t sure what it was or if he could give it but he could at least try. But his mind was blank and the air around them thick. He kept his eyes on the road.

Finally at Rhett’s house he stopped the car and turned to the blonde man. His eyes were red and puffy. It hurt every cell in Links body to see him like that, knowing that in some way he caused and not knowing what to do about it. He wished him angry, that at least he knew how to handle; there he had something to fall back on. Link took Rhett's hand.

“I love you”, he said. “You know I do.” Link squeezed the big hand lightly, hoping to get something in return but it lay limp in his grasp. “Always have and always will.” He whispered.

He really meant those words but they fell flat in the space between them. Link knew they weren’t enough to fill the void he could see behind Rhett’s eyes and it scared him.

There was a barely visible nod from the big man before he opened the door. In a blink of an eye he was out. Link looked after him when he went to the front door and into his house. His home. He sighed and suddenly tears burned behind his eyes and his throat tightened. Link gripped the wheel tight, clenched his jaw.

He drove the few miles to his own house, blinking rapidly whenever his sight got blurred by salty water. It was dark, his family probably asleep. He’d texted Christy earlier and told her not to wait up. He’d planned for them to stay at the studio. He just hadn’t planned it to turn out like this.

He rubbed the lingering tears out of his eyes, tried to swallow away the lump in his throat. Well inside he turned the light on in the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water, leaning against the counter with a sigh. He heard someone talk upstairs, a low mumble, and then footsteps coming down the stairs. Christy appeared around the corner, clad in pajama pants and a worn out top. Her hair was in a messy bun and she had a slight frown on her face.

“Hey baby”, Link said with a low voice. He didn’t want to disturb the probably sleeping children. He met his wife’s gaze and realized something wasn’t right. She held her hand to her mouth and looked at him with the same concern in her eyes that she usually had if any of the kids weren’t feeling well.

“Jessie called …” She said slowly with a knowing look.

Link frowned. He felt the irritation flare up like embers under his skin. What were they, five? Having their wives talk to them, about them like they were little boys having a fight. Had Rhett asked her to do that? Why couldn’t he just talk to Link himself, why did he have to go through Jessie, they were _just_ in the same car for heaven’s sake! Deep down Link knew that he was mostly angry with himself, for what he didn’t really know. He put the glass down on the counter and looked at Christy, reluctant to say anything about the matter.

“Ya’ll need to figure this out, Link”, she tilted her head worryingly. Link sighed, pushed his irritation away and rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands.

“I know.” He looked away, blinked a couple of times and then reached out for Christy. She interlaced her fingers with his and looked up at him. Another sigh left Link’s lips. He met her gaze. “It’s just… I don’t know how to …” He began, searching for words. Finally he just shrugged with a defeated sigh. “I guess I’m scared.”

Christy squeezed his hands.

“I know darlin’”, she brought one hand up to caress his cheek. He leaned into her soft touch. A moment of silent passed then she spoke up again. “To be honest …” She let her arm fall. “I am too.”

Link felt like something heavy hit him in the chest upon seeing Christy drop her gaze to the floor, biting her lip. He straightened up, gripping after her.

“Baby I …” he began with something desperate in his voice. He couldn’t stand to have hurt her too, not now, not like this.

“No Link, it’s fine really”, she gestured dismissively. “I knew what I got myself into when I married you. “ She looked up, smiling weakly.  “I knew you didn’t come alone. I know he’s tied to you in a way I never will be.”

Link opened his mouth to protest but Christy laid her hand on his chest, taking a step closer.

“It’s okay … I’ve accepted that”, she shook her head with a little smile. “It’s not always easy, I’ll tell you that much but it’s worth it.” She wrapped her arms around him and reached up to give him a kiss. “It will always be worth it.”

Link felt tears burn behind his eyes when he drew her in a tighter embrace and rested his head on top of hers.

“I love you. I’m sorry you have to deal with this.”

“I love you too, honey.”

 

Later that night, when he laid with his arms around his sleeping wife, he was struck by all the emotions at once. They gripped him in the form of ice- cold fear, rippling down his spine, making the hairs on his body stand up. He took a deep breath, inhaling the sweet scent of Christy’s hair, trying to calm himself down. He thought about her and Rhett. How they were the rocks in his life, how they stood by him in thick and thin and how much they put up with just because they, for some unknown reason, loved him. How lucky he was. How grateful. But how could he ever hope to give them what they gave him, how was he supposed to do right by them.

_I'm not enough. How can I be enough for them?_

Christy moved in her sleep, pulled at his arms and he nuzzled closer. Somehow he managed to fall asleep, lulled by the sound of his fingers lightly drumming at the headboard and the soft snores from his wife.

 

***

 

He was going to call him. But Saturday went by and the kids were going places where Link had to drive them and he’d promised Christy to go with her to buy some things. Then the house was a mess and he spent the afternoon cleaning, and suddenly all the kids were home again and they sat down for dinner, and before he knew it he laid down in bed, Christy curled up by his side and there were no messages or missed calls on his phone, so apparently Rhett didn’t want to talk to him anyway.

Sunday morning was equally hectic, but then Christy took the kids out and Link was left alone in a clean house, the dishes done and the rooms quiet. He started to hear his own thoughts again, which lead to him ending up in the corner of the couch, with a cold cup of coffee in his hand and his gaze far away.

He thought about how it had come to this. Where it started and why and by whose initiative and what the hell was “it” anyway? He recalled the so called “incident” in college. Those flashes of memories were not new to him. He’d played them over and over in his head for years. He barely knew if it was a memory anymore or just some fiction of his imagination.

_He’d said something stupid. Didn’t he always? Rhett mocked him for it. He mouthed back. Somehow it turned into some kind of wrestling match. Didn’t it always? Suddenly they were on the floor. This was nothing new, nothing they hadn’t done before; Link, struggling for dominance, grunting, chuckles and stifled laughter. And then Rhett’s weight on him._

_“’M dead.”_

_It wasn’t new but what was new was how Rhett turned his head to face Link and how his gaze flicked down to his lips, tongue darting out to wet his own. The difference this time was how the millimeters between their mouths were closing slowly, as if gravity pulled them together. Link felt his heart beat through his whole body, his world narrowing down to the sound of them ringing in his ears, the weight of Rhett on him and the warm breath on his lips. He closed his eyes and when he felt dry, chapped lips against his a rush of heat run through him, like everything was lit on fire._

_It only lasted for a fraction of a second, next thing he knew, the warmth of Rhett’s body was gone and he was left lying on the floor of their empty room. He kept his eyes closed. The air seemed to freeze around him and he started to shake uncontrollably._

_So many thoughts ran through his mind that evening. He didn’t know if Rhett would return, tonight, tomorrow, at all? He was halfway out the door to go looking for him a thousand times but ended up back on the floor again, as if trying to turn back the time. He didn’t know how this happened. He had no idea what to make of it, what to think or feel or do. And every time he tried to make sense of it he was overwhelmed by the memory of Rhett’s lips against his. He knew it was wrong. He’d always known how wrong it was, for so many different reasons and he felt his cheeks heat and his chest go cold at the mere thought of what his feelings were implying. That he was … like that. And with Rhett? He shook his head. But if it was so wrong, why had it felt so incredibly right? Like everything was falling into place. Then again, he always seemed to feel that way around Rhett._

_The door suddenly flew open and Rhett stormed in - his eyes wild with something Link couldn’t read- and closed it behind him with a bang. Link swallowed, drew a breath before he willed himself to meet Rhett’s gaze._

_In two long strides the tall man closed the distance between them, grabbed Link by the shoulders and pushed him back against the opposite wall. For a fragment of a second Link thought that Rhett was going to hit him, his whole body tensed and he tried to fight the taller man off. But then Rhett brought his hands up to grab Link’s face and suddenly his mouth was on his again. It took Link a moment to react and by then Rhett was licking at his lips, prodding to get entrance. Link felt like melting. He opened his mouth and kissed Rhett back._

_He marveled at how easy it was. How they seemed to know exactly how to twist and turn to fit together. How their tongues danced around in the others mouth, making Link dizzy. Rhett nipped and nibbled at his lower lip and Link whimpered into his mouth. He felt big hands slide down his body and lay to rest on his waist. He tugged at Rhett’s shirt, wanting him closer, wanting to drown in him, his scent, his warmth._

Link shuddered at the memory. He had never felt such need before, such an overpowering urge to just devour and be devoured. He’d lost himself completely in the embrace of Rhett’s long limbs. A feeling of being exactly where he should be.

The memories were just flashes after that. Lingering touches. Stolen kisses in the hallways. Nights with skin against skin, hot breaths and quieted moans. A constant weakness in his knees. Warmth coiling in his stomach, bubbling up in laughter. He’d been happy, content; though he still struggled with what it meant, with the shame that sometimes threatened to drown him whenever Rhett wasn’t around (because his mere presence worked as a lifejacket). And he’d been scared too, so scared, careful not to let it all out at once, not being too much. Not that he didn’t trust Rhett, because he did, with all his life and nothing made him feel safer than that scrunched up smile of his. But he did not trust himself. If there was a way to destroy this, he’d be sure to find it, he thought and so he kept his heart at bay, carefully capsuled in an attitude of indifference. Like: “this is cool bro, what we’re doing, but you know, whatever”. And then Rhett wanted them to be just friends again, to go back to what they were before, brothers in heart and soul. And Link agreed. Even though the thought of it, of never having Rhett that way again, broke his heart – the thought of losing him altogether tore it out, leaving nothing but cold emptiness in its wake. He couldn’t even imagine it, his mind and body revolting at the mere suggestion of it. So he talked it out with Rhett, leaving out some tiny details, (like how he felt like his heart was going to burst through his chest when they kissed), they hugged and decided it was for the best.

Not long after that he met Christy and she was like sunshine. He smiled, a feeling of pride filling him when thinking of the girl with the southern charm and sing-song laughter and how he’d made her his. She’d matched him in silliness and lust for life and at the same time she’d brought order to his mixed up emotions. He remembered thinking that she set him straight – literally.

Six months after they started dating he told her about him and Rhett. He had thought long and hard about it, woken up multiple times in the middle of the night sweating, his conjured up images of her screaming at him lingering for days. He knew she was the one. He knew when he looked at her that if he ever were going to spend the rest of his life with someone except Rhett it had to be her. But it wouldn’t be fair to her if she didn’t know. He also knew that if everything went as he wanted it to and he married her without telling her, he would live the rest of his life in fear of her finding out, in fear of her hating him. So he told her, completely sure of that being the end of it. He thought that if she for some miraculous reason didn’t leave him, didn’t run away in complete disgust, she’d make him choose between them. Her or Rhett. It scared him how easy that decision was.

But she didn’t make him choose. She cried, silently and she didn’t let him hold her. She told him she needed to think, that it was all too much and that she wanted to understand but couldn’t. She left and he thought that he’d never see her again.

A week went by and Link became a shadow of what he’d been in the months prior, the months with Christy by his side. Rhett tried to comfort him but it hurt all too much to have him close but not close enough and he couldn’t help but to see Christy’s tears every time his own was mirrored in Rhett’s eyes.

“I’ll talk to her”, Rhett said one day and before Link could protest he was gone. Neither Christy nor Rhett had ever told him what Rhett had said to her that day or what happened at all, but that evening Christy called and told Link, with a shaky voice, that she wanted to see him.

It hadn’t been easy at first. They talked a lot. They fought a lot. Link felt guilty and tried to over- compensate, which left Christy feeling annoyed. Then he would get mad because she got mad at him for “trying to hard”, and it was all just a mess where Link felt like he couldn’t get anything right and Christy felt like she wasn’t enough. He never quit on her though and she never made him choose, for which he was forever grateful.

But the thing with Rhett? Link once again thought about it and he knew it started long before all that stuff in college, at least for him. He remembered perked up cheeks and protruding eyes and a warm feeling in his stomach. He remembered Rhett going on about this girl or that girl and feeling something he couldn’t name at the time. He remembered being scared, thinking that he felt too much, that he always felt too much.

_He remembered being six years old, coloring mythical beasts and telling his name to that tall weird- looking boy, looking into his eyes and feeling safe for the first time in his life._

Link looked down at his hand. He was holding his phone and his finger hovered over Rhett’s name in the contact list. He sighed, scrolled down and called Stevie.

 

***

 

He’d already been at the coffee- shop for ten minutes when she appeared. She had her orange overalls on and her long hair fell in cascades down her shoulders. She wore her black hat and though it shielded her from the sun she also had a pair of sunglasses on. There was something ethereal about her, Link thought when she waved at him – miming that she was going to get a coffee before joining him - not just the paleness of her skin or the thinness of her limbs. It was in the way she talked and moved.

Stevie was so much more than an employee. When they brought her into the business they’d been a little weary, having it been just the two of them, and Jason of course, for so long. Nowadays Link sometimes wondered if they shouldn’t change their name to Rhett and Link and Stevie. She completed their duo in a way they hadn’t imagined with her ideas, her ability to organize them and her never-ending, honest care: about them, about the brand, the crew and all their productions.  She was also their friend and she was one of the most loving people Link knew. Beyond that she was smart and, despite her age, the wisest human being he’d ever met.

Stevie and Rhett had always hit it off. They had something special; they seemed to understand each other on another level, giggling at stuff Link rolled his eyes at, only needing to use very few words and gestures to understand each other. It was as if they were the same nature; two dorky blondes. Link smiled at that, thinking about how they sometimes even looked alike.

Now, when she sat on the other side of the table with a coffee in her hands and a questioning look on her face, he suddenly wondered if this was a good idea. Maybe Rhett wouldn’t be happy with him telling her this, maybe she would be uncomfortable, maybe she’d be angry with him, maybe… He stopped himself. There was no backing out now. He cleared his throat.

“M sorry Stevie, this isn’t really appropriate.” He watched her taking of her glasses and placing them on the table. “I just. Needed to talk. About some stuff.”

She crossed her legs and looked at him.

“That’s okay, Link”, she said with her thin voice. “What is it?”

Link sighed, avoiding her eyes.

“Rhett and I…” He fiddled with his fingers, searching for the right words. “We’ve been …” He hesitated. What had they been? Fooling around? Having an affair? He frowned. It all sounded so wrong, so harsh and real. Having sex? That’s what it was, wasn’t it? He looked up at Stevie, her face open and curious, waiting patiently for him to continue. “We’re kind of…” He swallowed. “… involved, I guess?” It came out almost like a question, sounding very silly to his ears. He looked down before leaning back and meeting Stevie’s gaze.

“Involved like in …” She waited for him to fill in the blank but when he didn’t she continued. “Like, sleeping together?”

Link sniffed but nodded. Stevie lifted her thin eyebrow slightly, leant forward and clasped her hands on the table.

“Okay …” she drug the word out. “Can’t say I’m _that_ surprised, really”, she chuckled slightly before getting serious. “So … are you … does your wives know?”

Link nodded again, crossing his arms over his chest as if to defend himself, also a little worried about how unfazed she seemed to be. Were they really that obvious?

“Yeah, they’ve always known.”

The eyebrows went up again.

“Always? Has it ... how long?”

Link shrugged.

“Since college but we haven’t always… I mean. It’s not.” He sighed. “It’s complicated. Or it is now. Hasn’t always been. I think.”

Stevie smiled a little at Link’s struggle with deciding what he meant.

“So what changed?”

“I don’t know, really … it’s Rhett. He just. He seems to, I don’t know, struggle. Like he wants … something else?”

At that Stevie let out a slight hum. She looked at Link with slightly squinted eyes while holding her hands palm to palm, tapping her fingers against each other.

“Do you love him?” She finally asked, her voice a bit harsher than usual.

“Of course I do.” Link answered almost offended. “Stevie, it’s Rhett, you know I love him.”

She hummed again, her index finger against her bottom lip.

“Well, are you _in_ love with him?”

The question took Link by surprise even though maybe he should have been expecting it.

“I’m in love with my wife.” He stated before even considering giving her another answer, not letting _himself_ contemplate another answer, even for a moment.

“That’s not what I asked.”

Something in her eyes and the firm tone of her voice made Link drop his defenses. He sighed, put his elbows on the table and leant his head in his hands.

“I… I don’t… I mean how could I? I love Christy, how can I be in love with two people? And it’s not … it’s not like that. It’s not the same, like it doesn’t feel…” He dropped his arms down, laid them flat out in a gesture of defeat.

“Link”, Stevie laid her delicate hands over his. “Love is not black and white. There aren’t always sharp lines, you know.” Her voice was soft now, her touch comforting. “I think we’ve been taught that that’s the case but it’s not. Love and lust and everything in between come in so many different shades. It’s not always easy to distinguish what is what. And maybe you don’t always have to?” She squeezed his hand a little before moving away.

Link swallowed and pushed his glasses up the slope of his nose to regain his composure. He considered her words for a moment, shifting in his seat. Link didn’t like it, he knew life was messy but he wanted things to be clear, neat and orderly. He opened his mouth to say something, didn’t find any words, and closed it again. There was something he ached to ask, or maybe it was more of a wish to at least voice it, see if there was a way to make sense of it. He started to bounce his leg up and down and he felt something icy in his stomach. It dawned upon him how scared he actually was. Of what, he couldn’t say and he felt all tangled up in stuff he didn’t know how to handle.

“So am I gay or bi, or what?” He then blurted out, threw his hands in the air with a giggle that came out a little too high and sharp. He tried to play the question off almost as a joke but he immediately knew that Stevie would be able to sense the fear behind it.

The blonde woman cocked her head, considering him for a moment.

“Does it matter?” She then said with a soft look. “Cause if it does, for you, then you are whatever you feel comfortable with being. But you don’t need to label it either you know, if that’s not important for you. Or if you don’t know yourself.”

Link looked at her while she sipped her coffee. He felt weird, what the heck was this? Here he was, a 38- year old man with his young employee, discussing his sexuality and talking about his sexual relationship with his best friend of 30 plus years. Who happened to _also_ be her boss. He almost laughed – this had to be the definition of a middle- age crisis if anything.

“Look”, Stevie brought him out of his thoughts. “For me it helped labeling what I am and I really identify with being a part of that community, but you don’t need to do that. You can just be Link and be in love with Rhett.”

He flinched upon hearing those words fall of her lips. He once again felt like laughing. It sounded so… What? Wrong? Silly?

“I’m not…” he started protesting and Stevie held up her hands.

“Alright, alright, you can just be Link and you and Rhett can be”, she smiled. “Whatever you want to be.” The smile faded and she looked at him with an almost scolding look. “As long as you talk about it. And both of you are okay.” She took another sip, eyeing Link over the rim of her cup. “Okay?”

He hummed slightly. He knew she was right, somehow. It was just. A Lot.

He decided to change the subject, asking her about how Enzo was doing and if Cassie had gotten that new job. Stevie seemed to understand his need to talk about something else and didn’t argue. Finally he glanced at his phone, realizing Christy and the kids would be home soon, telling Stevie he needed to head back. She nodded but then once again gripped Link’s hand. He met her bright eyes.

“I know I don’t know either of you as well as you know each other” she paused, smiling sly to herself. “Wow, that was many “knows” wasn’t it?” She shook her head. “Anyway, what I _do_ know is that you’ve never let anything come between you, so to think that _love_ of all things would is just silly. You’ll get through this, no matter the outcome. What is it you always say? ‘Conflict is needed and communication is the key’?” She tilted her head, the silky hair falling over her shoulder as she did so. “Maybe it’s time to communicate?”

Link sighed.

“Yeah. Maybe you’re right.”

The difference being he usually knew what he wanted to communicate and now he didn’t even know for sure what the conflict was about or if he could call it that. He didn’t have a clue about anything. Not where to start, how to explain since he couldn’t even do that to himself. And he was scared. Despite what Stevie said this couldn’t compare to anything they’d been through before. Or. That time in college, and they had gotten through that, Link tried to tell himself knowing that it wasn’t entirely true. It’s all relative, he thought. Would he have wanted it to go another way back then? Yeah, maybe, but at the same time no, because that choice led to so many other wonderful things he couldn’t dare to even think about being without today.

He said goodbye to Stevie, thanked her for her time and lingered a while longer than usual in their half awkward side-hug. She waved at him when he got into his car.

“See you tomorrow, boss.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this took me forever to write. I've realized I'm more suited to write shorter type stuff but hey, I actually have hopes for this to be finnished - there's probably just going to be one more chapter.
> 
> Leave me comments and kudos because I use them to feed my ego and it's very hungry, thnx lovelies! Also I'm @mythicalpatterns on tumblr if you want to be my friend (I mostly just lurk around though).


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